I have always found April to be a challenging month.  During the winter months, some aspects of my life are able to hibernate (certain home, garden, and work projects), but then spring, a season literally and figuratively budding with new life and possibilities, arrives, and I am suddenly inundated by a real sense of urgency and hurry.  There is now so much to do.   I’ve now got to be more productive and stop wasting time!

As we mentioned in both our January newsletter and our introduction for this month’s newsletter, the theme we are focusing on this year in our newsletter and summer series is “Pressure Points,” reflecting on some of the stress in our daily lives (productivity, perfectionism, and popularity) and possible ways we can respond more healthfully to them.

Therefore, rather than allowing myself to get caught up in my normal April frenzy, I intentionally made myself pause and consider: what do “productivity” and “wasting time” really mean?

Turning to one of my favorite resources, the Webster’s dictionary (sadly no familial connection), “productivity” is defined as:

1. 1. Having the quality or power of producing, especially in abundance.

1. 1. Yielding results, benefits, or profits.

1. 1. Effective in bringing about.

What struck me about this is that, societally speaking, there is a lot of emphasis placed on the first two entries for the word – “producing in abundance” and “yielding results and [particularly] profits,” which in some instances are important and should be sought after.  

Yet, I believe it is the third entry for the word – “effective in bringing about” – that needs further exploration, particularly for those who are seeking to bring about God’s reign on earth (here and now).  

In other words, how effective are we being in terms of loving our neighbors?  Or cultivating relationships, especially with those who see the world differently than we do?  Or creating intentional spaces where joy can be experienced by all who have gathered?      

Regarding the definition of “wasting time,” Wikipedia Encyclopedia (which is not considered a scholarly resource, but I found it provided some helpful insight) stated that it “may refer to:

1. 1. Idleness, a lack of motion or energy.

1. 1. Goofing off, engaging in an idle pastime while neglecting obligations.

1. 1. Procrastination, avoidance of doing a task.”

Again, when I looked at these three entries, I found that all of them conformed to society’s general negative understanding of the term “wasting time.”  And therein, I believe, lies one of our challenges.  “Wasting time” can certainly become a problem when obligations and responsibilities are neglected.  However, “idleness” or “ a lack of motion” is not, and should not always be considered, a bad thing.  

In fact, many “successful” people (whether in business, music, arts, professional sports, etc.) have mentioned how “wasting time” is a vital aspect of their “productivity.”  [Click here to read about the benefits of “wasting time.”  Note: several articles about this topic that I prefer more have recently gotten moved to behind a paywall.]

Likewise, Jesus often paused in his ministry to rest and pray as he went about “productively” sharing God’s love with the world.

Therefore, this month, and hopefully  in the months to come,  I want to challenge us all to slow down and to intentionally “waste time” so that we can hear from God how to be more productive/ “effective in bringing about” the abundant life that God wants for us all.*  

Here are some reflection questions for your consideration:

• • What does “productivity” look like to you?  Thoughts?  Words?  Images?

• • Do you constantly feel like you are in a hurry or rush?  What is fueling that feeling?

• • How have deadlines, timelines, and bottom lines affected your pace of life?  What sort of power have you given to these imaginary lines?  What options do you have?**

• • How would you define “wasting time”?

• • When are “productivity” and “wasting time” compatible?  When are they not?

• • What are some of your favorite ways to productively “waste time?”  

Eastertide Blessings,

Karen H. Webster

HSHC Co-founder/Executive Director

*To have more opportunities to reflect on this topic be sure to register for our Summer Series (registration opens Monday June 3, 2024)! ** The questions in this bullet point were taken from the Spiritual Disciplines Handbook: Practices That Transform Us, by Adele Ahlberg Calhoun (2015), page 80.

“Lightening Up” Expectations 

With the holiday season close upon us, it’s natural for our stress levels to start to rise.  Why does this happen in such a predictable pattern every year?  Perhaps, in part, it’s the expectations we set for ourselves and others.  We may make it our mission to set the perfect table, find the cutest photos for holiday cards, create boxes filled with homemade goodies, or find the perfect gifts for everyone on our list.  

Or perhaps some of our stress and expectations fall along relational lines.  We expect the headstrong child to return home for the holidays, estranged relatives to reconcile, and neighbors to get along.

However, I would like to encourage you to reflect upon your holiday expectations (or other expectations that you are wrestling with right now) and consider whether you can lighten any of them up.  I know for me, my “middle-aging” body has forced me to reflect on some of my personal expectations.

In September, I ran the Berlin marathon—a goal which took two years of planning.  First, my goal was to qualify and, second, to run under my target time.  

Did I meet my expectations?  Yes and no.

Yes, I qualified for the 2023 Berlin marathon. 

Yes, I completed it within my target time.

No, I did not expect that now, almost two months later, I would need to completely stop running (something I have not done in more than fifteen years other than an occasional week here or there) to give my body time to heal.

While slowing down has certainly been challenging, it has also shed some new light on my holiday and future expectations.  As we head into this holiday season, I have been reminded that:

• Some expectations we set are realistic, and some are not.
• Sometimes, there is a cost to meeting ours or others’ expectations.
• Sometimes, expectations will be met, but perhaps not within the timeframe we initially set or in the way we envision.

So…how do we deal with this tension between planning for anticipated outcomes and accepting reality as it unfolds?

Scripture speaks of Jesus as the light of the world (John 8:12).  When we, as disciples, walk in the light, we gain increasing clarity about who and what  to center our lives around: Jesus and Love.  

In this season when daylight doesn’t last as long as we would like, we can set aside more time to soak in the light of God’s word.  Doing so will help us shine Christ’s light and love and establish healthier expectations of what that looks like in practical terms.  

It will also give us a sacred space in which to recharge during this busy season.  We are told not to cover our light under a bushel basket, but this does not mean our light has to be “always on.”  Seeking activities that replenish rather than drain our energy may translate into paring down your holiday feast to give yourself more time to spend with family.  For me, slowing down has enabled me to be gentler on myself and others when we don’t meet my expectations. 

So this season, when you sense your spirit tiring, why not respond to God’s open invitation to walk and talk out in the sunshine (of course, for those of us living in colder climates, this may mean throwing on another layer or two!)? This activity is doubly beneficial because spending time in the physical light (sunshine) also improves our health in multiple ways.  For us humans, light is essential for healthy bones, mental wellbeing, immune and neuromuscular function, glucose regulation, and decreasing some forms of cancer and other diseases.

In addition, spending time in nature gives us the opportunity to connect with plants, which need sunshine as much as we do.  In plants, light generates food (photosynthesis), creates new growth cycles, and promotes healthier development.  Being outside also reminds us how connected we are to all of creation and gives our own body a chance to relax. 

As counterintuitive as it might feel at first, the next time you’re overwhelmed by expectations (like the endless to-do list), I want to encourage you to pause and plug into the various sources of life-giving light that are all around you. 

To learn some more tips and strategies for establishing and nurturing healthier expectations, we have provided a few resources in the “Health Highlight” section of our newsletter. 

May the light of Christ shine upon you this holiday and into the new year,

Karen Webster

HSHC Co-founder/Executive Director

*Photo Credit: Canva

Leave It To Leaves

This past spring, my husband and I moved to Pennsylvania after having lived in the South for the past eleven years.

One of the changes I found myself recently needing to take advantage of was a forecasted warmer fall day to finish preparing our garden for the upcoming winter months.

Up until that point, I had already pushed off the task of laying a blanket of mulch on our garden to protect our newly established fruit bushes and other perennial plants for several weeks, in part because I didn’t feel like working outside in the cooler weather, but even more because I had been constantly feeling the pressure to get my work done – deadlines were looming, and I was already anticipating the stress that comes from the busyness of the holiday season.

However, between the gift of a warmer day and the extended weather forecast, which was projecting some very cold upcoming nights, I found myself no longer able to… Click to Read More

It is hard to believe that in a little over two weeks it will be Thanksgiving, which officially kicks off the traditional franticness of the holiday season, and before we know it Christmas presents will have been unwrapped and the ringing in of the new year completed. While there are many aspects of the holiday season that are joyful and are fun to anticipate, it is also important to acknowledge that we are also entering into our second COVID impacted holiday season. A time where we will be combining the “normal” stress of the holiday season plus dealing with the chronic stress of dealing with COVID, which has caused: increased anxiety, depression, fatigue, restless sleep, stress eating, decreased physical activity, and more.

One the one hand, this may look like the perfect storm for our overall health and wellbeing. On the other hand, if we take a few minutes now and commit ourselves to doing several small (and manageable!) caring-for-self practices throughout the holiday season (click here for some tips and ideas), not only will we feel much better in the midst of the stressful season, but we will also be able to enjoy the celebration of Christ’s birth and excitement of the new year more fully!

In addition, due to the chronic stress that many of us have and will be facing, we hope you will check out some of the other stress-oriented articles, resources, as well as the information about our new 6-week “Restore and Renew: Strategies for Stress” program (starting in mid January) found in this stress edition of our newsletter.

Peace,

Karen and Travis Webster

HSHC Co-founders

“Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.” 

Isaiah 41:1-10

Stress-less Holiday Recipes:

Let’s face it, cooking during the holidays can be stressful enough, but it can be even more stressful when family, friends, and other guests have various allergies and/or dietary sensitivities that need to be considered when meal planning.

To help reduce that stress, we’ve provided a few websites with recipes that are both plant-based AND avoid some of the most common food allergies.

16 Allergy-Friendly Plant-Based Holiday Recipes!

14 Healthy Vegan, Gluten-Free and Allergy-Friendly Thanksgiving Recipes

Plant-Based Holiday Recipes*

*This last site addresses many food sensitivities/preferences like dairy, eggs, and seafood, but the recipes may need to be modified to address some of the other common allergies (gluten, soy, nuts, coconut, etc.)

Dealing with the physical aspects of COVID has received a lot of attention in media.  However, the mental, emotional, and spiritual impacts COVID is having, particularly among COVID survivors, need far greater awareness than it is currently receiving.  In order to get a better understanding of the impact of COVID on these other aspects of health, Karen Webster, HSHC Executive Director, recently interviewed a community of faith member who shared their COVID journey.  To learn more, check out their Q&A session below. 

When did you have COVID, and how did you experience it?

“I had COVID in mid-November, and I’ve no idea where I got it.  I wore masks everywhere.  I started coming down with COVID symptoms right in the midst of celebrating my husband’s mother’s 90^th birthday with a very small gathering of close family members, followed the next day by our daughter celebrating her 16^th birthday with a very small group of her closest friends in our front yard with everyone wearing masks and socially distancing themselves. 

Since we had visited family out-of-town, my husband’s boss had said, ‘I want you to get a COVID test before you come back to work.’ My husband’s result turned up negative and, for a moment, I thought I would be ok, but mine, however, turned up positive.  And I just remember thinking to myself, “What? How can this be?” I was shocked and mortified.

My husband immediately called his 90-year-old mother, and he, too, started panicking because it was his side of the family we had just visited – his brother, who’s over 60, sister-in-law, his niece, and nephew.  I immediately started having a shame panic attack.

The first person I called was my mom, and she said to me, “Well, did you get tested before you went?” She immediately made me feel even worse than I was already feeling about myself and all my regrets, the guilt.  I hung up and cried. What did I just do?  I just endangered all of these people. The people I love the most could die now. It’s my fault. I’m sick… That was the worst hour.

Whom did you feel comfortable telling/who was your support network?

“I’m a private person, so normally I would not have told anybody else.  However, in this instance, I had to share the news with my husband’s family and the people who attended my daughter’s birthday party, which included telling my four closest friends who had been at the party… crying.  In terms of my support network, I told my friends because I had to, but really it was only my husband and daughter.  COVID is very isolating.  First, you’re told to quarantine, and then, if you’re feeling shameful about it, it is a super isolating disease.”

What messages were you receiving that impacted how and with whom you shared your diagnosis?  How did those make you feel about your diagnosis?

“Internally, I thought, ‘How could I have done this to people?… holding on tightly to shame and regret.  Externally, my friends said to me, “You know, you didn’t do anything wrong.  You were careful.” Through the process of sharing with my four friends, I felt cared for.  And then, because they interacted with other people I knew, they would tell me, “Oh, I told so-and-so, and they’re really concerned about you,” and my first reaction inside would be, “You told them!?” I really didn’t want anybody outside of my super tight inner circle to know because I was afraid I was going to be judged.  And the thing that surprised me and I did not anticipate is anyone being concerned about me and my health.  Rather, I had been thinking, “I’m bad.. Are they going to be mad at me? They’re judging me…Who did I almost kill?”

What could your faith community have done to support you while you were sick?  Is there any support you would like from them now?

In terms of my faith community, I emailed my two pastors because I knew they were safe people to tell and that they were there for me.  They wrote back, “Oh no, let me know if there’s anything I can do.” And that was it.  Looking back, I think what would have been helpful was to have received a phone call from one of, or both of them, to help me discern what I needed because at the time, I did not know what I needed!

I also serve on one of the congregation’s leadership teams, and, at first, I didn’t tell them because it didn’t occur to me.   However, at a meeting shortly after my illness, someone started asking about how those in church could “help those people.” This upset me and, without having planned through what I was going to say, I immediately jumped in and shared my experience as a COVID survivor.  

COVID is challenging enough physically, and then to add the stigma… you must have caught COVID by not wearing a mask or doing something you shouldn’t have done or going somewhere or not washing your hands or not doing something you should have done… I’ve even caught myself thinking, “Well, of course, that person got it, because they…” From a cultural-global-spiritual perspective, COVID is really highlighting our biases, stereotypes, judgments, and hypocrisies.  The committee appreciated that I brought this awareness to them while, at the same time, I experienced being cared for.

Any final thoughts?

“I grew up in the eighties during the AIDS epidemic.  My immediate reaction after having gotten the positive test for COVID was a deep, new compassion and empathy for people who had AIDS.  In the eighties, we heard about them, and we judged them.  Having COVID, I realized that they not only had to deal with being physically sick, but they also had to deal with mental and emotional pain from being stigmatized… guilt, shame, “Who got sick because of me?” It would be interesting to talk to someone who also had coronavirus and AIDS and see if it’s any kind of similarity.”

Reflecting on my experience spiritually, the only thing I can compare having COVID to is all of the grief, despair, and complete brokenness I felt when my dad was diagnosed with cancer and died, a six-week process from diagnosis to death.  Through the experience of the brokenness I felt after my dad died, I learned that I was loved not because of how much I do and who I am (type A, high achiever, successful athlete), but I learned that people loved me, and I was lovable even at my worst, my most broken.  And my experience with COVID was learning that lesson again, on another level.  So, actually, it has been a very cool spiritual period.”